I want you to want me.

 Me?

Nikki, I like you. You know who i am. Something like shit.

Shit. Shit if you don´t. Shit, i want it. Shit it´s. Shit, i don´t know what i really want. I know. My butt is wet. I know what i want and i want what i like. I´m a lonely girl, travelling from town to town. Is this life? Is this what i really like and want to do all my life? I do like my miserable simple life. I can´t even imagine what money could do to my so simple and simplifyed life. How many things i´d do? For me? For sure much more than this shity miserable life that i live. Its been and is the reason why i am a piece of shit of a man today. In reality i´m lonely. I love loneliness and the miserable life that i have been living. The main reason that have been keeping me here all this and so long time. The reason why i´m still here today in this asshole. Why am i lonely? Do i have some secrets. Yes i do. Tell me your secrets. You don´t need to tell. Your secrets are my secrets. It was me you have created and made your secrets. Your road travelling secrets. The hidden places. The hidden nights in dark and hidden sides. Those roads, trails, woods and those lakes where you have been. I have been the sun rays in your heart. I have been in the fields and in the motel rooms where you have been in search for some love in the showers with me.

It´s raining. The rain drops are cold and i need a shower to wash my last sins. A wash machine to wash my dirty clothes. A dry machine to dry my wallet. A couple of small boxes, ´cause when it´s hot on the road i divide and hide my dirty cents in small boxes and not in my wallet or in my pocket.

Loving you, it´s a mortal sin. 

Not loving you but having the sin in thought. I find no definition for it and i don´t have the answer of what it´s the relationship between love and sin and sin and love.

Sin will be if i take a step to love you.

On the last video she seems to me down. A little bit lost. Disorientated. Was not one of her best video editions. Seems to me visible.

On thought, something happen. Was it good? Butt wet, in what she went in or is she in?

Nothing serious. Just, life goes on. 

With a feet chained and with other that want to walk forward.

What to do, to know and to learn how to do it?

What to do and not to do, to know and to learn how to do it?

She is having some thoughts and some issues about her pet. The van is not a place for an animal to live. The other thing is about hygiene care. A clean van. Food care. 

Wash the hands before you do something... some shity thing. Shit.

..........................................

And the thing is that you went straight to the swimming pools and naked.

And the thing is that you have exposed yourself on propose, and posed yourself several times for a fashionable photo shoot sessions. Because i told you to not set the world on fire, you disobeyed to me. You did exactly the opposite of what i told not to do. Because i told you about the devil´s tools. Because of it you have open yourself and in clair for those eyes on the walls to watch you and to shoot you. Because you are searching and looking for fire. You want fireworks.

Yes they took pictures of you and they made some films too. You are feeling it in your body. And by consequence it goes to your mind. You feel and then the think and sink. You fall. You have been dreaming about things and things and things. About them. Them is to many. How much is to many? But how the dreams are made off? Everything is temporary. Gets lost with time. There will be some memories. There will be. But also a lie. It´s a lie. It´s the whoring job. Not memories. They do their job when they want to do it. For it there´s a chuck. The tool, the tools, the substances and fireworks. It works, No one can resist to it. It´s tempting, higher and stronger than anyone. So they all fall in temptation and in sin. So they all get chained and ready to serve the social and the public for a couple of pounds. Sometimes for half the price and others for free because they are all trapped and chained. And when things start to get wrong the hard drugs come in. Many die, It´s a clean kill if something very wrong happens, They do what and when they want to do something within their own interest. The iris of your eyes and the chuck. The devil´s tools. They play when they want to play. They fire you up when they want fire on the road. As you said, you have been dreaming about them. Those with who you have been in perdition on the lost road. Those with who you have been live for the social. You are a prime entertainment for them. 

Yes i am. I´m making love with me girl.

I´M FUCKING LOVING ME GIRL IN MY ROOM. TRUEGERKS.

Yhummy

I´M ALIVE

N G R

 N G R

Helloween I´m Alive

You, you say, you have lost the way Got no aim, just livin' for today Look up to the sky above And see the morning sun again You got so much power inside So cry it out my friend I'm alive I'm alive (I'm alive) I'm alive I'm alive There's no use in hangin' all around You're a king, can't you see your crown? Look into my eyes so many things are waiting to be done You just need a friend Together we will sing along I'm alive I'm alive (I'm alive) I'm alive I'm alive Look into my eyes So many things are waiting to be done You just need a friend Together we will sing along I'm alive I'm alive (I'm alive) I'm alive I'm alive I'm alive I'm alive (I'm alive) I'm alive I'm alive!

Motel door 16 room 16 2 hours and 16 minutes. Live on cam for the social entertainment. It´s a big business out there.

Chained. Yes. You are chained. The reason why you are playing their scripts. Doing what they say to you to do. No, they don´t want to kill you. They want you in their team playing their game, you. With some prizes in the middle. They have to give to get what they want. Your brain and your body. They have been sucking your brain and your pleasures to the bones. Butt wet, the chuck likes it. It´s glorious.

It´s a poop. That is what it it´s. Shit.